It finally caught up to you.
After all of these years, it finally happened. This actually happened and I can’t blink and do a double-take or simply wake up to make it okay again. It’s real.
I can’t look at your picture without feeling anger and disappointment, because this is what I feared the most. I can’t look without questioning, “Why did you do this to yourself?”
I knew you were capable of so much more than this, but you never saw it. I wanted you to succeed, dear. That’s why I put you on a pedestal.
To be blunt, you’re in deep shit.
And I don’t think there will be anyone that can or will help you anymore. Even I am trying to gather the nerve to ask to help you. But I want you to learn your lesson, yet I don’t want you to get hurt either; it may just be inevitable. You did this to yourself.
Monday Jan 30 10:01amWhen things in your life seem, almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.
A professor stood before his philosophy class
and had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
And proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students, if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes.’
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively
filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.
‘Now,’ said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - family,
children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions –
Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, Your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.
The sand is everything else —The small stuff.
‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ He continued,
there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are important to you.
So…
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
‘Take care of the golf balls first —
The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled
‘I’m glad you asked’.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
There’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.’
Academic Goals:
1. Earn at least one 4.0 semester again before I graduate (yikes!)
2. Take the GRE/TEAS.
3. Finish up my nursing pre-req classes by the end of fall.
4. Research, talk to advisors, and apply to nursing schools.
Miscellaneous Goals:
1. Attend at least three fitness classes/week.
2. Save money for Spring Break in DC (SESC/road trip), (potential) summer cruise, applications/GRE/TEAS costs.
3. Get a litto. Enough said (but I cannot get one for the sake of getting one).
4. Earn a research assistant position.
5. Write some decent articles in The Odyssey.
6. Get involved in another organization.
7. Listen to NPR at least once a week.
8. Be a better friend.
Fun Goals:
1. Learn everything there is to know about football and be able to know what is going on during the game without explanation before college football season starts.
2. Go fishing (angling and deep sea)
3. Read at least ten books this year
4. Train/prepare for The Color Run (12/2/12) and Warrior Dash! (2/2/13)
5. Attend at least one Tampa Bay Lightning game6. Attempt to not shop for a consecutive 30 days (except for groceries, or challenge accepted? Haha)
7. Teach myself how to play guitar
2011 has been quite a challenging year for me:
Losing three important friendships, losing someone that was a significant part of my life/that I truly cared about, experiencing my first real heartbreak, hitting rock-bottom, questioning my faith (and still searching), getting my tragus pierced, turning 21, being able to forgive but not forget, rekindling a friendship with my one of my childhood best friends, being able to be open (and tell her everything that has happened) with one of my current best friends, and having the best sorority sisters that a girl could ask for. I am very thankful blessed.
But I think I’ve finally gained new perspective in life and I’m ready to tackle on 2012 with great optimism and motivation.
Saturday Dec 31 11:37pm
Found this on Free People. Which was, quite honestly, much needed.
Monday Aug 8 04:15amOne of the life lessons that comes with age, is that life is not always the same – there are many phases, and change is a continual force that will take hold of your life as it progresses. Before the change comes, it’s typical to be in a state of limbo. You’re figuring out what to do next, and this can be unsettling for the psyche.
It’s the unknown of change that humans fear. Although I’ve experienced it too, this fear continues to puzzle me. Every time I’ve gone through a big change, I found myself in a new chapter with new enchantments. An entirely different moment, no better or worse than what came before. You gain new perspectives, and learn things that you would never have gotten the chance to learn had you stayed put in life. So why are we scared of this?
I’ve come to the conclusion that it is entirely mental.
It’s time to adapt – to face our fears, and learn that change is normal and healthy. To become wise we must gather life experiences through the passage of many phases. So next time you find yourself in that state of limbo, and it’s scaring the crap out of you, don’t let your fears get out of line. Know that it means you have once again come to that point where you can grow from change, and look forward to the surprises that lay ahead – you never know what you’re about to learn.
- C. S. Lewis Thursday Apr 14 11:44pm
I usually create 8 resolutions/goals every year (because 8 is my lucky number); let’s hope that I will be more successful this year.
1. Start writing in a journal again
2. Do super awesome in school :D
3. Make going to the gym part of my daily schedule or at least dance around the house for 10 minutes4. Be more stylish: i.e. stop wearing sweatpants/gym clothes to school all the time! (unless I am actually going to the gym)
5. Find a nice boy
6. Branch out of my social circle/be more involved in other school-related orgs
7. Spend less so I can travel more!
8. BE MORE CONFIDENT!
“and him… he’s dating that one girl… they seem pretty serious. but i think he could do better.”
“i think he’s just settling”
“yknow, i think we all settle at some point…”
and that’s kinda sad, ain’t it? when we all just settle because we “should”… because its that time to… but are we happy? are we satisfied? did we do our best and get what we wanted? probably not. but we’re happy enough with what we have RIGHT NOW. and when that “right now” is 26, 27, 28+ years old, that’s what you stick with. because by then, you NEED to be stable. you WANT to be stable. and if what you have at that moment is “good enough”, then you keep it.
God forbid, that is the one thing I am afraid of: settling because I’m too worried about being alone. Just for the sake of being stable, safe, secure.
I really hope that I won’t be 35 and not married.
My God, I am only 20 years old and I am already worrying about this sort of thing.
That’s just alarming disturbing.
Susan: The real world is just a really scary place. I’m cringing at the thought of it.
Barry: Why do you think I’ve been avoiding it for so long?
[side note: we’re both students at UF and he’s been in the Marines prior to going to college.]
Wednesday Dec 1 11:58pm— That would be a little bit more than fantastic if I could. Monday Oct 18 10:17am
